Random Musings

Congratulations to the Colts. Finally, the nice guys have a notch on their belt. I loved the way the owner and Coach Dungy of the Colts gave Honor to whom Honor is due: Baba God. I love the game. I'm happy Peyton finally got his ring. Congratulations all around

My weekend was...eventful and not necessarily in a good way. A good friend of mine came from London to visit and I thought we were going to have a ball painting the town Carolina Blue. That was not the case. My dear friend came to the States sick so I became nurse/mother for the better part of the weekend. I didn’t necessarily mind but it really hurt when I tried to help and he just, for lack of a better word, dismissed my efforts. I chalk it up to the medication and the vomiting and the high temperature clouding his mind.

My future hubby
I don’t know if I’m weird or anything or if other women go through this. My older sister called me the other day and said “NJ, I miss him”. I replied “Who?” and she said “my husband.” Mind you, my sister has never dated or is married. That’s another blog topic for another day. I absolutely empathized with her because I have felt the same way. Especially when you think you have met him and he turns out to be a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
I have seen him, I have felt him, I have loved him, I have cared for him, I know him in glimpses of others. There is a certain build, a certain character, a certain aura about him that I glimpse from others. I saw him in my ex, I saw him in my crush(see Here) and I believe that’s why it took me so long to get over that certain crush. There is a certain male species that I believe he is part of. And it hurts. Because he is out there and I am being assailed with partial mimics of him. Last year, after I broke up with ex, I really sought God’s face on this subject. And I heard from Him. I know he is out there, but this waiting definitely teaches patience.
Sometimes I miss him, sometimes I’m happy I haven’t met him. Other times I wonder if he thinks about me, if I’m ready for him, if I’ll recognize him when I meet him or will I be too busy to be still. Is he preparing for me as I am for him. Will he be all I imagined and more? Does he sit up nights thinking about my character and personality and beauty and wishing that our paths have crossed already?

Faith (Christian Faith to be exact) and Promiscuity
I just can’t seem to reconcile the two together. I read my Bible and I read God’s word of not partaking in pre-marital sex or sexual immorality. I read God’s word about forgiveness and His Grace. Then I read about what He says about not putting on us what we cannot bear. Then I make friends with other Christians or read their blogs and I just get a vibe that either God’s word has changed or we are more or less taking advantage of the grace we are being bestowed to give into sex before marriage. I am singling out sex because it seems the culture we are in, be it within the Christian community or secular, it’s become more prevalent. Everyone’s excuse is different- we are human, its good for you, how can you marry (buy) someone without making sure you are sexual compatible (test drive).
Or is it just simply God isn’t where He should be in our lives and we have put our consciences on the back pedal to fulfill our youthful desires. I’m no saint and I have put myself in situations where my restraint was wholly tested but just never could go through with it. I’m not even talking one time, ‘I slipped affairs’, I’m talking on the regular and boasting or talking about it like there's nothing wrong from a God's point of view.
Anwyas, just a few things on my mind...I may expand on some topics