Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Caught up

What a whirlwind weekend flowing into a week I know is going to be wonderful and blessed.
First stop
If I was honest with myself, Atlanta was not on the map. I wanted to go with one of my girls DA, but that fell through. But when I spoke to him, I just couldn’t bring myself to cancel and disappoint him again. I had my reasons for keeping away. First, he is not a believer…at all. Second, I was running in the direction of temptation and not fleeing and third, I always trip when I’m with him. It’s not like he is drop dead gorgeous, but he has this disarming charm and confidence that I really like. I didn’t, don’t , shouldn’t want to get involved. I’m not ready. I can’t settle for him above my Jesus! But I digress
So, I rented the vehicle and drove down to ATL Friday night. Funny enough, I didn’t fall asleep once and he kept calling to make sure I was alright.
He met me at the door and gave me the sweetest kiss ever…my resolve melted. All thoughts of keeping it strictly platonic became a façade I would try to keep, try being the operative word. He had cooked and of course was so comfortable in his own skin; he worked/walked around in the kitchen in only his briefs. I should have just up and left and went to my aunt’s house…ah well.
So, he left me in the living room and said it’s up to me. I really don’t know what was up to me since he had taken all my defenses down. Either way, I cajoled him to stay with me a little in the living room and not go to bed early. He started by asking why I decided to come after all this time, I replied that I had always wanted to, just didn’t have the time to. He kissed me...passionately. We slept, we kissed, we slept some more, kissed some more…tried to go a bit further, but I couldn’t. There is and should always be limits!
I had a wonderful weekend. From Coca-Cola to the Georgia Aquarium, to breakfast in bed, to watching movies, to kissing and cuddling, I had a blast. I visited my aunt and her kids, oh how the kids have grown. But in it all, I only read my Bible once, I couldn’t talk to him about what I read (because I felt I would be rubbing my faith in his face), why I act the way I do, why it seems sometimes I’m on a morality High, why its important to me to keep myself for my husband…not because I’m not human or because the pleasure wouldn’t be great….I didn’t tell him how I love my Lord so much that I made a promise to him that I intended to keep. Couldn’t tell him that’s why I didn’t trust myself with him because he threatened that promise. Couldn’t get him to understand taking it one day at a time wouldn’t work for me because I would not marry him if he didn’t on his own and not because of me, find his way to the Throne of God and accept his Son as his Savoir….Couldn’t, because one part of me is weak. Because I want him, want the things I deprive myself of for the appropriate time…but again I digress!!
I came back to town and back to work and the Lord showed up and showed out for me. I got admission into one of the top ten MBA programs in the States. Ahhhhhhh, my God is so good, so faithful. Even when I’m slipping, unfaithful, He always keeps his word to me. What more can I ask for out of a Father, Savoir and Friend??? Nothing! He loves me and I know I am falling in Love with him and learning to love him the way I should. I called my parents and sister and friends and told the good news. They were all happy. I am still waiting on the other two schools. I know my God is on top of those
Second Stop: Jamaica
Our first family vacation-ever! This place is beautiful but it may as well be Lagos 15 years ago. It took some 3 hours to get from the airport to the resort, but what a ride. We listed to Jamaican Gospel music all the way there. How about when we got to the resort, there was some mix-up with our reservations! But thank God it all sorted it self out. We went out to eat and had a wonderful time catching up and gisting each other and reminiscing about some childhood memories. BTW, the resort is beautiful, the water is so clear, the air very clean. So far so good…

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

all am going to say is wow